ST:TNG Season Four, Episode Thirteen "Devil's Due"

ST:TNG Season Four, Episode Thirteen "Devil's Due"
Production Order: 13
Air Order: 13
Stardate: 44474.5
Original Air Date: February 4, 1991

Data is on the holodeck in full Ebenezer Scrooge costume, arguing with a Jacob Marley ghost. After a moment, the audience realizes that Data is playing the character while Picard sits nearby, reading the play from an old-school hardcover book. Data cowers in front of the Marley ghost, and Picard freezes the program to praise Data for how far he's come in his acting skills.
"Eh, they're okay," says Data. "But I'm really not playing up the fear the way the play says I should."
"You've never known fear," shrugs Picard. "You can watch others and emulate them."
"No, I'm studying method acting," Data replies. "I'm supposed to draw on my own fear."
They leave the holodeck.
"Method acting is pretty old-school," says Picard.
They walk down the corridor.
"Yeah, I'm using it backward," Data explains. "People use the method to draw on their own emotions to help them act those emotions out. I'm acting the emotions out to see if I can form my own emotions."

Riker pages Picard to the bridge, and Picard says something nice to Data about finding his humanity before they part ways.
On the bridge, Riker tells Picard that they're getting an SOS from the planet Ventax II. The viewscreen is showing a live feed that's so staticky that I want to put tin foil on the Enterprise's sensor array. Worf tells Picard that it's all on the other end.

Onscreen is Dr Howard Clark, a Federation anthropologist who is running a science team on the surface of the planet. "Little help here?" he asks. "The people on this planet are rioting, convinced they're going to die tomorrow. We need to get the hell out of Dodge."
Then the transmission cuts out.

Zoom-in on worried Picard! Dramatic music! Opening credits break!

Picard's Log 44474.5: "Going to Ventax II to pick up the scientists and find out what's going on there."

They pick up another transmission from Clark, who is begging to be removed with his team. There's an explosion off-screen, and some screaming, and Clark reports that the mob outside has broken into the station.
Picard calls to the transporter room to beam out the team, but the chief replies back that he can only get a lock on Clark.
"Just him then," says Picard. He sends Worf to the transporter room to bring Clark to the ready room, and asks Riker to figure out WTF is going on down on Ventax II.

Livingston sighting:

In the ready room, Clark lays out the exposition: the Ventaxians used to be super-technological, but a thousand years earlier, they switched over to agrarian, ditching the tech and getting back to the land. Clark was interested in the switch, so he started doing anthropological studies on them. (Interesting side note: the Ventaxians are aware of the science station, and the fact that they were studied, unlike the Mintakans. Presumably, they let him study them.) First contact was made by the Klingons 70 years earlier, and since then, technology has been offered to the Ventaxians, but they were not interested.
"They were happy tending crops and living simply," says Clark. "They have no social problems. Things are pretty awesome for them. But a few years ago, their leader - Acost Jared - starting getting super paranoid about someone from the distant past, Ardra. "She's coming back, we have to leave" -that kind of thing. For lack of a better description, she's the devil. They think they sold their souls to the devil."

Riker calls Picard over his comm badge. "Hey, so the science team is being held hostage on the surface, and the Ventaxian leader - a dude named Acost Jared - is calling."
Clark and Picard rush back onto the bridge.
"Jared," pleads Clark. "WTH? We're friends!"
"I know," says Jared. "It's pretty fucked up. And I hate violence. But the people are freaked out about Ardra returning, and I no longer have control of the situation. The prophesies are coming true."
Picard looks at Clark, who shrugs. "Supposedly, earthquakes will occur. And there have been some little ones, but... way small. Insignificant."
"Sightings, too!" insists Jared. "She has been reappearing, like the ancient texts say she would."
"Can we help?" asks Picard.
"No," says Jared. "The group that has the scientists know that your weapons are not as powerful as Ardra. BUT, you guys are innocent in all of this, and you shouldn't have to suffer for our sins, so I'll see if I can get your people released."
"Cool," says Picard. "We can help you with this Ardra if need be."
They sign off.

The senior officers meet in the Obs Lounge with Clark to talk about how this is all going down.
"This is a pretty crap situation," says Troi. "It's spiraling out of control, and there may be suicides soon. These people are losing their shit."
Picard asks Data for the low-down on the Ventaxians.
"They made a deal with this woman: 1000 years of peace and prosperity, but when she came to collect, she'd enslave the population. It's actually considered bad luck to say her name."
That's a pretty shitty deal. Like, deals with the devil generally are, but usually the person making the deal also has to pay the piper. In this case, 50 generations were able to cash in on that peace and prosperity thing, because Generation 51 was going to pick up the tab. That's garbage. Imagine being Generation 51 and having everyone before you go, "hey, thanks for taking on the yoke of oppression for us. Good luck with that enslavement thing." Sounds like Jared accepts his fate, but still thinks it's crap.
"There are ancient scrolls that talk about her," shrugs Clark. "Sometimes scholars read them, but there hasn't been a lot of interest outside of academia, until recently."
Of course not. Generations 1-50 didn't give a shit.
"I think I'll go down planet-side and meet with Jared," says Picard.
Worf doing his job: "That's a bad idea. You could be taken hostage, too." He sounds annoyed, like Picard is deliberately walking into danger, and he'll have to save the captain. Revising his resume again.
But nope, no revising tonight: "I want you and Data and Troi to go with me," says Picard. "O'Brien can keep a lock on our communicators."
Worf nods, but it's clear this is not his favorite plan. It's interesting that a guy who comes from a people who are very... Leeroy Jenkins, is in a position where he advises others to be conservative, risk-wise.

The away team beams down into some fancy little chamber where Acost Jared is huddling with some other Ventaxians.
"OH!" says Jared. "You shouldn't have come! It's dangerous to be here now."
"If you're talking about the earthquakes, we scanned the planet, and they're pretty harmless. They won't bring you danger," says Data.
"No, it's not that," says Jared. "Ardra is coming!"
"That's stupid," frowns Picard. "Help me find our people."
There's an earthquake, and Jared looks panicked.
"She's here, she's here."
There's a flash of light, and a new person appears. Whoever scored this episode used evil-sounding unharmonic music to herald her arrival. Yaaasss.
"Wazzzup, Ventax," says Ardra.
High-fives to the costume department!

Ardra has chutzpah. She smoothly admonishes Jared for not keeping up his end of the bargain, then tells him he won't be punished, so he thanks her.
"And don't be bowing and scraping," she says, walking around the room. "It's boring. If I want you on your knees, I'll tell you."
Daaammmnnn, girl.

She stops in front of Picard. "Much better. Keep up the good work."
Ardra gives Jared a scroll and tells him she wants him to prepare for her a census of the population "with emphasis on productivity and economic forecasts."
"Who TF are you?" demands Picard.
The conversation between Ardra and Picard is mostly Picard being pissed off and frustrated that she won't give him a straight answer, and Ardra serving up a bunch of innuendo:
"My, you are forceful, aren't you? Good. I like my men to be forceful... at least at the start." And "That's all right. I like a challenge."
"Are you claiming to be the mythical figure Ardra?" Data asks her.
She says that she has several names, and lists off a few, and which group of people that identity belongs to.
"I'm also known to the Klingons as Fek'lhr," she purrs at Worf.
"Bitch, you are not Fek'lhr," scowls Worf.
"I am, though."
There's a flash of light, and this thing appears:

If she's not Fek'lhr, then she's a really talented cosplayer.
"I'm the guardian of dishonored Klingons," the thing growls.
Worf is taken aback. Recall that he's walking around with a bullshit discommendation. He and Fek'lhr would be roommates if Worf died today.
There's another flash of light, and Ardra reappears.
"You really don't believe me?" she simpers at Picard.
"I wanna see the contract," he states.
They go down to a dusty, cobwebby library (are there spiders on this planet?) and Jared shows Picard to the contract.
"It's a pretty standard contract with a really long term," sighs Ardra. "Lots of words that means I gave them 1000 years of paradise in return for enslavement."
"Can Data look at this contract?" Picard asks Jared.
"Um, it's not really up to me anymore," mumbles the leader. He looks to Ardra.
Jared, grow a backbone.
Picard looks to Ardra as well, and she teases him by saying he finds her intriguing.
"I'm just here to get the hostages freed," he corrects.
"WTH hostages are you talking about?" Ardra demands.
"Uh, the people panicked at the thought of your arrival, and they took several Federation scientists hostage," stutters Jared.
"That's such bullshit," says Ardra. "Free them, now."

Picard calls Clark to tell him to expect the hostages, then asks the transporter room for a beam-out for himself, Worf, and Troi. He insists that he isn't going to walk away from Ventax II and leave Ardra in charge. Data will stay behind to look at the contract.

Another senior meeting in the Obs Lounge with Clark.
They debate over whether or not Ardra might be Q.
"Feels like she's a flim-flam artist," says Picard. "The devil doesn't ask for economic forecasts, and neither do the Q."
"She has powers," argues Worf.
"Meh, we can do a lot of that same shit with transporters," shrugs Picard.
"She's hella focused," put in Troi. "I couldn't really see deception in her, or how she was doing it."
"Like a magician," adds Crusher.
Geordi is assigned to go back to the science station with Clark, to find out how the earthquakes are done, and Picard assigns the others to find the source of Ardra's power in this system.
They all put their hands in and yell "Enterprise!" before dispersing.

They exit to the bridge, and guess who's in the Big Chair?
Nope, not Wes.

"Bitch, leave my bridge, or I'll remove you by force."
"Ooh, yes please! Force!"
Geez, we've spent like five minutes with this woman, and we've already compiled a list of her kinks.
Picard directs Worf to take her down, and she sends a flash of light at his chest, knocking him backward several steps. Crusher rushes forward to scan him for injuries.
"Aww, I was hoping you would try it yourself," she tells Picard.
"Transporter room, please beam the intruder the fuck off of the bridge," Picard calls.

Ardra dematerializes, but when Picard asks the ensign at the conn to raise the shields, the chair spins, and it's Ardra in an Ops uniform.
"We're not impressed by your magic tricks," says Riker, who only has like, two lines in this episode.
Data enters the bridge, and Ardra gleefully refers to him as "my pale friend" again.
"So I looked over the contract, and it's pretty water-tight," says Data. "One thousand years of peace for personal servitude to Ardra."
"You're so fabulous and speedy," gushes Ardra. "You cannot be human."
"No, I'm an android," confirms Data.
"Yay!" she practically kiddy-claps. "I get an android, too?"
"How the fuck do you mean?" demands Riker.
"When the contract came due, I was entitled to everything on the planet, in the air, and in orbit. So I get the Enterprise, too!"
Everyone looks at Data. "Yeah, she could interpret the contract like that," he confirms.
She laughs and vanishes, leaving behind one very baffled-looking Ops ensign in his chair.

Dramatic music! Commercial break!

Picard's Log, supplemental: "Gonna research this chick to find out what her deal is."

Picard is rabbit-holing on the little desktop computer in the ready room when Data comes in. Picard tells him that he has been researching the con game, and damn that sounds interesting.
I could totally waste an afternoon reading shit on con artists. Also, marathon documentaries on con artists.
"Do you think Ardra is a con artist?" asks Data.
"Yes, I do!" says Picard. His body language says that he has some exciting gossip to share with Data. "I'm gonna reveal her to the Ventaxians. I don't know how Ardra came into this, but she's part of their theology now, and we have to shake that tree until some shit falls out. I want you to look at the contract and all of Ventaxian law precedent for the last thousand years. Find a frickin' loophole."

Picard is asleep in his quarters. He's fallen asleep with a book open on his chest, and... his head in a planter?

Anyway, a breeze blows through his quarters, and you know that's bad news bears. He wakes up to a blue light flash, and guess who again?

God, that's awful. Reminds me of -

Picard tries to page the bridge. Nada.
Ardra laughs, saying that she planned for privacy here. He stomps out of bed and attempts to leave his quarters, but the door won't open.
"I know you're attracted to me," she purrs.
No, honey. That's you projecting.
"I'm not attracted to you in any way," he corrects. "You're gross and obvious."
"Oh, I can change it up," she replies.
Yay, another Sylvia.

"I can be your perfect chaste woman, and succumb to your charms."
Ew.
Picard just stares at her.
"Or maybe a more professional woman, someone who's always around, but inaccessible."
Ardra disappears, but then -

NO THANK YOU, DO NOT SHIP.
She's pissed when he tells her to fuck off, and she drops him, jammies and all, in the science station down on the planet.

Geordi, who is working with Clark, contacts Worf for Picard.
"Hey, could you beam Picard up from the surface?"
"Directly to my quarters?" requests an exasperated Picard.
"Um, what?" asks Worf.
"Ardra did a thing," grouches Picard.
Worf attempts to have Picard beamed up, but reports problems with the transporter due to "interference."
"Ugh," says Picard. "Just have Data come get me in a fucking shuttle. And have him bring a uniform!"

Data and Picard are heading back in the shuttle, and Picard tells Data that Geordi and Clark haven't found anything, and neither have Riker and Worf. He's crabby as hell because some creep woke him up when she broke into his quarters to force herself on him. Things are not going well in Picardtown.
"Found a loophole," announces Data. "There was this case where a Klingon craftsman got into it with a Ventaxian homeowner, and they agreed to arbitration, rather than going to court. Only case with an alien claimant."
"Good. Let's nail her to the wall."
The shuttle calls the E to prepare for docking. Then the freaking ship disappears.
"Oh, fuck me," sighs Picard.

Dramatic music! Commercial break!

Downstairs, Picard is working with Clark, La Forge and Data to figure out where the E went. Hails are going unanswered. La Forge and Clark have found traces of Z-particles when the ship disappeared, but they can't find evidence of the E being anywhere within a light-year of the planet.
Ardra shows up and boasts about how she used her fancy powers to take the ship.
"I want arbitration," Picard tells her.
"For what? I came to collect on a contract, and I am."
"I think you're a fraud, and I intend to prove it."
She's amused. "Okay, but if I win, what do I get? I don't have any reason to go along with this farce."
Picard thinks, then offers to show her a priceless archaeological find. She appears to consider, then tells him she isn't interested, and wants to choose her own prize.
"I want you," she smiles. "By all rights, your body is already mine. But I want more. I want your heart, your mind, your soul and I want you to give them to me without resistance, of your own free will."
Wow, going full Jareth the Goblin King, are we?
Honey, rapey does not look good on you. Back off.
"I agree to your terms," growls Picard.
"Oh, Picard. I will enjoy you morning, noon and night."
Gurl, STAHP. Gross.

Picard reminds her that they need to choose an arbitrator, and she selects Data.
"Um, dude is a member of my crew."
"My crew," she corrects. "And as an android, he is incapable of deceit or bias. He'll be a great arbitrator."
Data asks to speak to Picard alone, and when they are out of earshot, Data reminds Picard that Ardra is right.
"That's fine," says Picard.
"But I might not find in your favor," Data protests.
"You're pretty much the only person on this planet that she can't intimidate," Picard points out. "I'll take it."

We go straight to the arbitration.
Jared is sitting in some kind of hot seat, giving exposition on his culture's history.
"So, a thousand years ago, we were a mess," he says. "There was overcrowding and warring among the city-states, and the pollution was awful. Water and air were garbage. There was a constant threat of starvation and illness."
"What happened?" asks Ardra.
"You came along."
Picard calls for an objection. "There's no evidence she was here a thousand years ago."
Sassy Guest Star Moment: "I suppose you want a thousand-year-old witness?"
Sassy Picard Moment: "That would be great, thanks."
She asks Jared how the contract says she'll be identified, and he responds that the date, the earthquakes, and the sightings would all identify her.
"I fulfilled all of those requirements," Ardra tells Data.
Data overrules Picard's objection.
"So I came along, and what happened then?" she asks Jared.
"We made a bargain: 1000 years of prosperity, and then you come to collect at the end of it."
"Why would you make a bargain like that?"
"We had nothing to lose," says Jared nervously. "Things sucked."
Ardra rests her case, and Picard gets up and appeals to Data: Ardra has not proven that she did anything to improve the lives of the Ventaxians, so Data should invalidate the contract.
"Nope," says Data. "You haven't proven your case, Picard. Keep going."

Mmm, a rainbow of jewel-toned clothing. Yum.

Ardra stands up. "Can I question opposing counsel?"
"That's weird," says Data. "But I can't think of a reason to deny it, so go ahead."
"Cool. I won't be too hard on you, Picard. You know how much I like you."
"Come on," Picard objects.
"Seriously," Data tells her. "Quit telling opposing counsel that you have the hots for him."
"You don't believe in my powers?" Ardra asks Picard.
"Nope."
"How about now?"
The room shakes with an earthquake.
"Hey. Knock it off," says Data.
"Now?"
She makes Picard vanish.
"Hey, I said stop," Data tells her.
Picard reappears in the chair, and she appears as the devil.
"What about now?" the devil demands.

Data bangs his gavel. "I told you to fucking knock it off. Do I need to find you in contempt of court?"
The devil figure vanishes, to be replaced by Ardra. "Do you know how I accomplish these things, Picard?"
"No," scowls Picard.
Ardra chuckles and sits back down.

Dramatic music! Commercial break!

At the science station, La Forge has picked up on coordinates for the E. It's in orbit over the Western pole of the planet. Clark plugs them into the scanners, but doesn't find anything.
"I'm not buying that "magic" crap," says La Forge. "We're gonna find that frickin' ship."

Back in the courtroom, Picard asks Jared to describe exactly what happened after the bargain with Ardra had been struck.
"Did she snap her fingers and make you guys kiss and make up?"
"No." Jared casts a nervous glance at Ardra. "We created a committee to draw up a constitution, which the people ratified."
"Oh, so Ardra advised the council?"
"...no."
"She gathered up the weapons and destroyed them?"
"No, the leaders did that, then signed a treaty of nonaggression."
"Okay. Let's talk about environmental stuff. Did Ardra fix the pollution?"
"Um, no. We switched from industrial base to agrarian, because it was more ecologically sound."
"Did Ardra clean up the water and air?" asks Picard.
"No, the leaders passed laws and things."
Sassy Picard Moment: "Did Ardra not even pick up one piece of trash? She didn't do anything! You guys did it all yourselves!"
Ardra objects, saying Picard is drawing conclusions.

Picard rests his case, and Ardra is given time for rebuttal.
She approaches Jared. "Do you have any doubt that I intervened on behalf of your people?"
Jared is uncomfortable. Picard just made some hella good points, but he might be taking to the devil here, so best not to take chances.
"No."
"Are you satisfied with the life I gave you guys?"
"Yes, Ardra." Jared bows his head.
Ardra turns to Data. "Everyone agrees that I fulfilled the terms of the contract."
"Do you have more evidence before I make my ruling?" Data asks Picard.
La Forge comes into the room unexpectedly. Picard requests a one-hour recess, which Data grants.
They all go their separate ways, and Geordi pulls Picard aside.
"We found her ship in orbit. She has a Romulan cloaking device."
"STFU. Really?" asks Picard.
"Yeah. And the E is right where it always was. She just tossed her cloak over it like a freaking invisibility blanket. She set up a dampening field over it to cut off communications. And we already made contact with both ships."
"You're the fucking best, Geordi. I have a plan, but we have less than an hour to set it up."

Reconvening, Picard asks Jared if he can trust his senses.
"For the most part," says Jared.
"Okay, what if I told you that Ardra has no actual powers, and that I can steal what she does call powers?"
Jared gives Picard a wry smile. "Yeaaah, you're not Ardra."
"Let's start with this," says Picard.
A huge earthquake starts. Everyone is surprised, including Ardra.
"This is annoying," Data says after a moment. "Stop the earthquake, please."
"Okay," says Picard. "Or maybe Ardra wants to do it?"
Ardra pauses. "Um, I like the earthquakes."
Picard shuts them off. "How about this trick?" He makes Ardra disappear. "Come back, Ardra!" he calls. "No?"
He makes her reappear. "One more?"
This time, he disappears and Fek'lhr returns.
"It's pretty shitty for you to be wandering around the galaxy, pretending to be Fek'lhr," he growls at Ardra.

"Okay, this is amusing, but getting tedious," Data announces. "Shut it down, please."
Picard reappears. "Thanks for humoring me. I can do these things because we took control of this woman's ship, which has been in orbit around Ventax II. My crew has been helping me do these tricks, just like her crew was helping her. Riker has been listening through my communicator. The different tricks are controlled by eye movement."
He starts to walk around the courtroom. "Ardra said she was known by many names, and that's true. Her crew admitted that she has 23 aliases in this sector alone."
Ardra starts to blow up. "WTF?! You talked to my crew?"
"Yeah, she's been pulling cons all over the place," continues Picard. "And the mythology of Ardra probably looked pretty awesome to her, so she studied it, reappeared at the right time, with the right prophesies, and convinced you all to just surrender."
Jared is suddenly seeing Ardra in a new light.

Ardra gets up. "So hey, I should get going. I'm not really interested in Ventax II anymore. So I'm gonna invalidate the contract and be on my way."
She starts for the exit, but Jared was quicker and called for some security. She's met by a couple of uniformed dudes.

"The contract is dissolved," announces Data.
Jared approaches Picard. He tries to give Picard credit for saving the Ventaxians, but Picard reminds him that the Ventaxians saved themselves a long time ago.
Data walks up to them and congratulates Picard on his win.
"You would have had a lot more fun if you'd lost," laughs Ardra.
Girl, take your human trafficking elsewhere.
She's escorted away by the uniformed guys.
Picard rolls his eyes and he and Data walk away.

Man, I love this episode. It's light and comedic, and follows the heaviness of last week's episode nicely. Also, the idea of a female con artist always entertains me. In a world where a lot of the interesting parts are given to men, a woman who has shady morals is a nice change of pace. (Yeah, okay: I like comedic con artists. Doc Terminus is easily my favorite character in Pete's Dragon. Sue me.)

Strange to see (and I'm not sure how well this episode or idea aged) is the trope of Ardra being creepily attracted to Picard. The idea of a female being the aggressor, or obsessively pursuing a male, or threatening violence (sexual or otherwise) is still sort of thought of as being funny. A year or two ago and it still would have been funny. But with all that has happened, gender-swap stories don't work quite as well. Rapey female is not funny, just as female-on-male violence is not funny. People like to pretend it is, but males who have been harassed by females will tell you it's not. Ardra is both amusing and creepy, much like TOS' Harry Mudd.


- Fun Facts:

- An early draft of this story was written for TOS, which makes sense, given Gene Rod's obsession with the crew of the Enterprise meeting God. The censors were not okay with this idea, but told him that meeting the devil was okay. This idea was taken advantage of by TAS, who produced the acid-trip-inducing The Magicks of Megas-Tu. Gene Rod's dream partially came true when William Shatner wrote the script for Star Trek: The Final Frontier (A Complete Piece of Garbage). When this episode was not used for TOS, it was co-opted for the aborted series Star Trek: Phase II. Following the cancellation of that series, this episode and "The Child" (also a Phase II script) were both considered for TNG. "The Child" was rewritten and used as the premier for season two, and Devil's Due was set aside to be reworked and used during the writer's strike. It was determined that TNG characters could not just be slotted into the original story, so the script where Kirk confronts the devil character with the help of the computer judge, was reworked with Picard and Data.

- Marta Dubois, who played Ardra, had read for several parts in TNG episodes, but never seemed quite right for any of them. However, they loved her for Ardra and wanted to start filming with her right away.
- The character of the devil was originally a male named Komether.
- Picard uses the phrase "Fek'lhr of Klingon," as Qo'noS has not been set as the name of the Klingon homeworld. Qo'noS won't be used officially until the sixth Star Trek film, but it would be a while before Qo'noS will be used universally.
- This was the highest-rated TNG episode since Encounter at Farpoint.
- This episode was nominated for an Emmy for Outstanding Costume Design in a Series.
- At the beginning of the episode, Data plays Ebenezer Scrooge while Picard watches. In 1999, Patrick Stewart will play the part of Ebenezer Scrooge in a remake.
- Jonathan Frakes remarked about this episode, "It's ironic that it was an old Star Trek story, because it's really a Kirk story. It was so 60's."
- The part of Fek'lhr was played by Tom Magee.

- The part of the Terran devil was played by Thad Lamey.

- The lines at the beginning of the episode in which the ghost of Jacob Marley asks Scrooge if he believes his senses are mirrored at the end of the episode, when Picard asks Jared if he believes his senses.


Red deaths: 0
To date: 0
Gold deaths: 0
To date: 0

Blue deaths: 0
To date: 0
Unnamed color crew deaths: 0
To date: 11,000

Obnoxious Wes moments: 0
To date: 1

Legitimate Wes moments when he should have told someone to go fuck themselves: 0
To date: 0

Sassy Geordi moments: 0
To date: 2

Sassy Wes Moments: 0
To date: 1

Sassy Worf Moment: 0
To date: 2

Sassy Riker Moments: 0
To date: 6

Sassy Picard Moments: 2
To date: 7

Sassy NPC Moments: 0
To date: 1
Sassy Data Moments: 0
To date: 1
Sassy O'Brien Moments: 0
To date: 0
Sassy Crusher Moments: 0
To date: 2
Sassy Troi Moments: 0
To date: 4
Sassy Guest Star Moments: 1
To date: 3

Number of times that it is mentioned that Data is an android: 3
To date: 18

Number of times that Troi reacts to someone else's feelings: 2
To date: 13

Number of times that Geordi "looks at something" with his VISOR: 0
To date: 0
Number of times when Data gives too much info and has to be told to shut up: 0
To date: 0
Picard Maneuvers: 1
To date: 16
Tea, Earl Grey: 3
To date: 5

Princess Ginger