ST:TNG Season Four, Episode Fifteen "First Contact"

ST:TNG Season Four, Episode Fifteen "First Contact"
Production Order: 15
Air Order: 15
Stardate: Unknown
Original Air Date: February 18, 1991

Last week can go fuck itself.
Bad week at work, bad week at the cat rescue, bad week at our sister dog rescue, bad week family-wise, and because the world didn't hate me enough, I had 95% of that week's blog post done, and some technological hiccup ate several hours' worth of work just before the deadline. This laptop is a thorn in my side, but technology has always hated me, so I shouldn't be that surprised. (This week, it appears that the laptop keyboard wants to drop random F's into what I type, so if you see a typo like that that I didn't catch, that's why.)

*******

We start out in a hospital, probably some kind of alien emergency room. The doctor/healer/medical people are rushing to get someone hooked up to their equipment, but are baffled when the person's anatomy seems weird. The patient is missing "costal struts," his heart is where his digestive tract should be, and "his terminus has digits!"

"What are you?" one of the medical people asks the unconscious patient.
Oops, it's surgically-altered Riker.

Dramatic music! Opening credits break!

When we return to the hospital, Riker groggily wakes up and asks what happened. The head doctor guy tells him that he's in the Crisis Room at the Sikla Medical Facility, and he's very injured, but he'll be okay.
Riker reveals that he was caught in some riots and then there were cops, and then he woke up here.
Dr Berel (the head guy) asks Riker some personal questions, and he stumbles through the answers: he's Rivas Jakara, from the Marta community on the southern continent. Then they ask about his hands and feet, "and oh, hey - your cranial formations are surgical implants?" Thinking fast, Riker tells them he has a bunch of genetic abnormalities that he inherited from his father, and plastic surgery added the cranial ridges. He tells them his own doctor, Crusher, knows more about his medical weirdnesses, and could he please leave and go see her?
"Nah bro, you can't leave," insists Berel. "You're in bad shape. We can contact your doctor?"
"Oh, she's on sabbatical. Also, I have no family."
Not helping yourself, Riker.

Berel and the others start to leave, but then he backtracks to ask Riker about the phaser they found on him. Riker tells him it's a toy, a souvenir he was taking home.
"I thought you had no family?" asks Berel.
Riker is all offended. "It's for a neighbor's child," he responds haughtily. "Hey, um... I had a piece of jewelry? A pin?"
"No, sorry," replies Berel.
After they leave, Riker tries to sit up, but loses consciousness.
Screwed now, buddy. You're in a weird city in the hospital, with no phaser and no comm badge, and they know you've been surgically altered to look like them.

There's a short scene next that's all General Hospital-soap opera, where the doctors argue in the hall. Nilrem (we haven't learned his name, but he's kind of an ass) tries to convince Berel that Riker is an alien, and it's because the space program has been launching stuff into space, and now they've attracted aliens and shit! He immediately starts in on conspiracy theories, and maybe there are more, and maybe they're everywhere, blah blah blah.
Berel tells him to STFU, because he doesn't want rumors started. In the meantime, they're going to check out his story and put security on his room 29 hours a day.
Man, these people get five extra hours a day? Fuck their lucky asses.

We switch over to the office of the Chancellor, and just to make this writing thing easier, I'm going to tell you that we're on Malcor III, and these people are the Malcorians. There's a scientist, Mirasta Yale, and a lady who is probably the Chancellor's secretary or assistant or something as she has no lines here, and some other guy who also has no lines (another assistant?), then this douche-canoe named Krola.
I do not like Krola. He looks like an alien Ned Flanders and bitches about traditional values like someone's racist grandfather. He's the minister of security, so I have no idea why he keeps on about traditional values.
The scientist wraps up her presentation to the Chancellor (Durken), and tells him that if she gets the go-ahead from him today, she can launch her warp program in ten months or less.
You can tell that this project is her baby. She's so freaking excited to get her butt up into space.
But Krola's all like, "this is too much, and we're moving too far from our traditional values, and the people won't like this, and they've put up with your progressive shit for a while now, Chancellor."
"Dude, I'm not gonna push us backward into the Dark Ages," Durken tells Krola.
(They had a Dark Age? Interesting.)
Durken gives the scientist her go-ahead, then tells Krola that after Mirasta has done her space thing, they'll scale things back a bit to let everyone catch their breath, which is probably smart.
You're only as progressive as your least-progressive member of society, unfortunately.
Mirasta gives Krola a smug smile, because wouldn't you?

Mirasta Yale appears to be working by herself in a lab late at night when two familiar figures beam into the room.
"Hey, are you Mirasta Yale?"
"Yeah?"
"Cool, I'm Jean-Luc Picard and this is Deanna Troi. We're from a federation of planets, and we're both from different ones. We've been checking out your progress toward warp-drive capability, and we think you're just about there, so the time was right for first contact. We like to meet this way, instead of randomly in deep space."
"We've come to you," explains Troi, "because you're a leader in the scientific community, and scientists accept our arrival easier."
"We're hoping you can help us with intros to your government and people," adds Picard.
And now, the healthy skepticism: Mirasta backs up and asks angrily if this is a joke, and if "Lupo and the others from the lab" put them up to this.
Picard's answer is badly-worded, in my opinion: "Oh, it's certainly no joke. As you can see, we are physically quite different from Malcorians. And, with your permission, I'm prepared to prove it to you."
WHAT ARE YOU PROPOSING, PICARD?
"I would like that," Mirasta responds.
So Picard asks for a beam-up for three, and it sounds like they are going somewhere to compare peepees.

Dramatic music! Commercial break!

Picard and Troi take Mirasta to Ten Forward, and she checks out the various people before standing, charmed, in front of the big window where she can look out over her planet. They grab a table, and she waxes poetic about being a little kid with her parents in the planetarium, and dreaming about going into space and meeting other beings, and how she keeps waiting for the lights to come up and the show to end. She asks Picard how they knew to contact her, and he sighs a big sigh.
He's shown her the spacious kitchen and whirlpool bathtub in the master suite of this dream house, but now he needs to tell her that the walls are full of asbestos and the bathroom is moldy.
"Soooo, before we introduce ourselves to new people, we check out your broadcasts and your music and humor, and see what kind of people you are. But, um... it doesn't tell us everything. So the best way to get the job done is to surgically alter some of our specialists, and you know, have them blend in with your people and spy on them."

"Excuse the fuck out of me?"
"Yeah, they've been there, watching you, for a few years," Troi confirms.
"It's dangerous not to have to full understanding of a people first," Picard adds.
Mirasta nods. "Okay, I get it. That makes sense. But a lot of my people won't. They'll think you're invading or something."
Okay, now he has to break it to her that the basement is haunted.
"We have another problem - one of our people is missing. He's Commander Riker, my executive officer. And he disappeared in the capital city under the name of Rivas Jakara, a visitor from the Marta community. Can you help us?" asks Picard.
"Oh, totes!" she agrees. "But hey, let's keep this on the down-low, okay? Malcorians are pretty sure that they're a superior life-form, and also the center of the universe, and this would change the paradigm a lot. Some people won't want it to."
(KROLA.)
Picard asks about Durken - how will he take the news?
"Um, curious but guarded," she guesses. "But don't tell him about your surveillance or Riker yet. He'll assign Minister Krola of Security to look for him, and Krola will use Riker for his own crappy political agenda."
"Are you sure?"
"Yeah, we should keep that part to ourselves at first."

Dr Berel is walking through the corridors of the hospital, and all of the medical workers are hardcore gossiping about Riker and possible aliens, and what if there are more?
He grabs Dr Tava, who was with Riker earlier, and hisses at her that he thought he said to keep this shit contained. Apparently, that other doctor - Nilrem - is a big freaking gossip, and now everyone is talking.
"You can't keep this under wraps much longer," Tava tells Berel. "People will find out and lose it."
"Yeah, but whatever he is, he's our patient first, and we have a responsibility to care for him."
Yaaaasssss, Berel is a professional.

Berel goes in to check on Riker. "So we can't find you or your doctor in our system, and your address in Marta is a restaurant. I don't think you're one of us."
"Do you know how weird you sound?" Riker asks in return. "Not one of us? I'm just a regular guy with some genetic abnormalities."
"Really? Because peeps think you're an alien. And we've been doing stuff in space lately, so imaginations are running wild. You gotta tell me who you are. Otherwise, people will keep talking until things get dangerous, and they won't end well for you."
Looking less professional, Berel.

A quick trip over to Durken's office, where he's stamping papers and doing Chancellor-type busy work.
An assistant calls from the outer office to tell him that Mirasta Yale wants him to meet someone.
"I don't have time for that shit," Durken bemoans. "Ask her to call the Vice-Chancellor."
"Nah, she's here in the office already," says the assistant.
"Ugh. Okay. Send her in."
When Mirasta enters, he keeps stamping papers and says in a long-suffering voice that there's always time to meet her friends.
"Yeah, I think you should clear your afternoon for this," she says.
Picard enters behind her.

Dramatic music! Commercial break!

Picard leads Durken and Mirasta onto the bridge of the Enterprise, and she points out the viewscreen to Durken, showing him their planet from above. The Picard introduces them both to Data, and Mirasta, awe-struck, tells Durken that Data is an android.
Durken requests that he and Picard meet somewhere private to talk about stuff, and Mirasta excuses herself to return to the surface. Once Picard and Durken have left, Mirasta asks Data if they have heard from Riker. Amusingly, she uses a tone and manner that suggests that this is all old-hat to her, being on a starship with aliens and an android.

In the ready room, Picard offers Durken a glass of wine and introduces him to the toast, wishing them both good fortune in their new, impending friendship.
"You're a good diplomat," says Durken. "I appreciate diplomacy, but I don't always trust it."
"Trust takes time," Picard agrees.
"Conquerors often arrive with the words we are your friends."
"We're not conquerors. We want a friendship. We want to help guide you into a new era. But how we go forward is up to you."
"What if our wishes conflict?"
"There won't be a conflict," Picard shrugs.
"What if I want you to leave and never return?"
"Then we'll do so.We won't interfere with your natural development. That's our Prime Directive."
"Uh-huh," says Durken. "Does that mean you're not gonna share your fabulous technology?"
"Pretty much."
"Is that how you maintain superiority?"
"Dude," says Picard logically, "suddenly dumping a bunch of tech on an unsuspecting world is harmful."
Durken sighs. "Yeah, that's probably true." He goes to the window. "Every night I go home to my family, and they ask about my day and if it was a good one. And today I have to tell them I woke up the leader of the known universe, but this afternoon, I'm just a voice in a chorus. But I think it was a good day."
Yay, friends!

We go back to Riker, who has gotten out of bed against medical advice and is looking for a way out. He grabs a short bench and is preparing to throw it through a small, high window when a medical worker comes in.
"That's not gonna work," she advises. "There are tons of people in that corridor out there."
Oh, man. It's Bebe Neuwirth. She plays delightful weirdos, and I like her so much.

She says she's not afraid of Riker, and asks if he's an alien. "You can tell me! I won't tell anyone!"
"I need to leave."
"I can help you out of here - it would be easier for you to get out if you went out the service door. I can distract the guard."
"Cool, let's do it."
"Why should I?" she asks.
He decides to throw caution to the wind and humor this walking tin foil hat. "You know why. I don't belong here. I need to get back to my ship... in space."
"Okay, I'll help you."
But she has a stipulation:

...

Ohhhhh, girlfriend has a kink. She's always wanted to make love to an alien, and I don't mean to kink-shame here, but that's real specific, and outside of this situation, when will she ever get the chance to get her rocks off like that? She'd have to find someone willing to dress up like an alien and get down with her, and if they're not into it, where's the fun in that? The hilarious part here is the layers involved: Riker is an alien, pretending not to be an alien, pretending to be an alien to humor a woman who will help him escape if she gets to bang an alien.
Riker is thrown. He's really not interested, but he needs to leave, and it's probably against regulations of some kind to get down with the natives on a First Contact mission.
She tells him her name is Lanel, and she quickly starts clearing stuff off the hospital bed in preparation, and it's sort of funny-creepy. It's a ridiculously awkward situation. She totally propositioned him, and he's not interested, and he tries to let her down easily.
"There... there are differences in the way my people make love."
Who knows if that's true? Maybe, maybe not. Only Riker and the First Contact watchers know for sure. He may be full of shit. Humans and Malcorians may have very similar bits and ways of doing the deed.
"I'm willing to learn!" she says enthusiastically, taking off her glasses. She strokes his fingers and calls him "my alien."

At some point later, Lanel coyly pushes her glasses back up her nose and peeks around the door, looking for all the world like she got what she wanted. Did Riker give it to her? Probably not, lol. Maybe he performed oomox on her and told her that was it.

Either way, my guess is that he bullshitted his way through something that she'll describe to her diary in great detail as soon as she gets home.
She tells the guard outside the door that she thinks Riker has died, and that he should run and get help, and as soon as he takes off, she gestures to Riker to come out. Before he heads off, she asks if she'll ever see him again.
Sassy Riker Moment:

Riker sneaks through the hospital, trying to avoid people, but in a bit of rotten luck, he runs into Berel, Nilrim and Tava.
Shit.
A fight breaks out as they try to capture him and he attempts to defend himself, but one of these medical workers has a billy club (!) and they beat the shit out of Riker. One of them actually uses Kirk's patented two-handed back blow.

"WTF?" yells Berel. "Dude was already injured!"
Tava  examines him and discovers that they re-injured Riker's kidneys in the fight. They have to take him to surgery, and Berel yells that they need to contact Central Security. And who is that looking suspicious and guilty nearby? Riker's would-be lover.

Dramatic music! Commercial break!

We cut back to Durken's office, where he's talking to Mirasta and Krola about the situation. Present is that lady from before and that other guy, but they're kind of set dressing, and get no lines, and I haven't decided whether they're Durken's assistants or other Ministers.
"Picard says we're in control here as far as what happens next," Durken explains.
This where alien Ned Flanders goes off. "You can't be thinking of surrendering to them!" yells Krola.
"No one is surrendering," says Durken. "I've seen their ship, and if they were hostile, they could have just taken us over without effort."
"Oh, yeah? We captured one of their spies!"
Aw, crap. Point of no return.
"Um, that's Commander Riker," volunteers Mirasta. "Picard's First Officer. He's been missing for two days."
"Wait, you knew about this?" demands Durken. "What else do you know?"
"They've... had people on the surface for several years, collecting info. I warned Picard not to say anything to you about it, because I was afraid this would happen."
Basically, she knew Krola would be a dick. Which he is. Upon hearing the word "years," he ramps up the paranoia.
"OMG, who knows what they've been doing? Influencing our young, stirring up dissent?!"
STFU, Krola.
Trying to stay even keel in comparison to Krola, Durken asks where Riker is. Krola tells him that Riker is recovering from surgery and head injuries in the Sikla Medical Facility.

I guess she's another Minister, given how much side-eye she's giving Krola.

Krola gets Berel to let him in to see Riker, who is still knocked out from surgery. Dr Berel tells Krola that he's surprised that Riker has survived his injuries thus far.
"I need to interrogate him before he dies," says Krola.
Ugh, why are tv cops so unsympathetic to people of interest who are recovering in the hospital? Are IRL cops this dickish, too?
"He's still recovering," says Berel. "Come back tomorrow."
"Too long. We need to do it now."
Mirasta sneaks in. "Krola, let's give him back to his people. They have medical facilities on the ship and can care for him."
"Hell no. He's our bargaining chip. You have meds to revive him," he tells Berel. "Give them to him."
"Those meds will fuck up his heart rate and blood pressure and could do serious damage," argues Berel.
"You can't do it," Mirasta hisses at Krola. "You could kill him!"
Krola is adamant. Berel refuses. They have some kind of Hippocratic Oath on this planet, and he refuses to break it.
"Fine," snaps Krola. "I'll get someone to replace you."

Picard beams down into Durken's office.
Durken gets right to the point: he knows about the First Contact team, and Riker.
"Well, shit," says Picard. "Mirasta said not to mention it."
"Yeah, she tried to take responsibility."
"Nah, it was my mistake," Picard replies. He pauses. "First Contact is really super dangerous. We never know who is going to greet us. When we first encountered the Klingon Empire out in space, it went badly and we had decades of war as a result. The decision to do reconnaissance on planets before First Contact was controversial, but I think it's solved more problems than it's created."
"I... appreciate the logic in that," admits Durken. "But you should have told us about the surveillance."
"Yeah, we would have eventually. Things went... sideways. This is not normal for us. Unfortunately, everything the surveillance team got indicated that your people would not react well to First Contact, and that the surveillance would be seen as an act of aggression. We really hoped to find Riker before all of this went down, so it wouldn't complicate First Contact. I made a mistake, sorry," Picard finishes.
"I might have made the same mistake in your place," Durken admits. "Actually, I like that you make mistakes, like a regular guy. Makes you seem less superior."
"I've definitely done some stupid shit over the years," agrees Picard. "Can I have my guy back, please?"
Durken may have softened toward Picard a tiny bit, but he isn't giving an inch. "Maybe later."
Picard beams back up.

I like Durken's office. The lighting is a bit harsh, but the windows,
 furniture and architecture are cool.

Back in the emergency room of the hospital, Berel is being informed by phone that he's relieved of duty. Krola made good on his threat.
"Guess you're acting director now," Berel tells Nilrem the Gossip.
He leaves and Krola orders Nilrem to wake up Riker.

Dramatic music! Commercial break!

Nilrem: "Gonna set my jaw and act like I'm the shit, because I'm in charge now."

When we come back, Krola is ordering Nilrem from the room. Nilrem looks like he was feeling all pleased with himself, being the new director of the whole medical facility and being a cool kid and all, but then Krola tells him "you can't sit with us," and Nilrem looks all Sad Panda.
I would almost feel sorry for him... except he just pumped Riker full of dangerous drugs in a power grab. Walk of Shame, Nilrem. You got used.

Riker is groggy.
"I'm Krola, the Minister of Security. You're Riker, an alien. We totes know about you."
Riker drops the pretense. He's like, half-dead. Go for broke, Earthling.
"I need my people."
"Yeah... gonna interrogate you first."

Mirasta goes to see Durken. He tells her that he needs her for space expertise, otherwise she would have been fired.
"We have to let Riker go," she pleads. "Krola just gave him dangerous drugs to wake him up, and he could die. If he does, any chance of a relationship we have with these people goes out the window. His own people could help him. I'm sorry I didn't tell you the whole truth. I thought I was doing what was best for our people."
"Seriously? You're not the freaking Chancellor - I am! I decide what's best for our people!"

Back in the ER, Krola has fully given over to the Power of the Tin Foil Hat. He starts monloguing about how Durken would probably end up giving in and welcoming Riker's people, and that would be the death knell for Krola's way of life, and he can't permit that, so he's going to force Durken into walking away.
(Real quick, tho - how fucking selfish is that? "I like my life the way it is, so I'm going to alter the course of history for everyone on my planet"?)
"Dude, we're on a peace mission," groans Riker.
"No way," says Krola. "You have lethal weapons." He shoots a piece of medical equipment with Riker's phaser, and it bounces back and hits the wall.
"It's for defense," Riker mumbles.
And then, like any good villain, Krola outlines exactly what he's going to do: "People are about to run in here and see me dead on the floor, shot by you, with this."
He wraps Riker's hand around the phaser, pointing it at himself. Riker tries to stop him, but he's too weak. Krola sets off the phaser, and it flashes.

Tava and Nilram run in and make the exact assumptions that Krola intended: that Riker shot him with the phaser. Tava calls for a crash cart, and Nilrem determines that Krola has a weak heartbeat, but is definitely NOT dead.
There's a shimmering, and Crusher, Worf and a Blue Shirt appear in the crisis room.
"Hi, are you doctors?" asks Crusher. "I'm a doctor. What's going on?"
Tava stumbles through her explanation of "he shot him," while Crusher examines Riker. The Blue Shirt checks out Krola. Worf takes the phaser.
Crusher calls Picard. "Hey, Riker is near death, and I need to beam him the fuck out off here. Also, there's a Malcorian with a phaser wound in his chest. I wanna transport him up, too."
Picard, who is in Durken's office with Mirasta, gets the go-ahead from Durken and tells her to Make It So.

Upstairs, Crusher does one last scan of Krola as Picard enters with Durken and Mirasta. She tells him that both men will be fine, and Riker is stabilized, but he was near death and would have died had they not arrived right then. Krola was never in any real danger, as he was only stunned.
Durken and Mirasta seem surprised and Picard explains that phasers are for defense.
"So, looks like Krola's hand was on the phaser when it went off," explains Crusher.
"They were struggling for it," says Durken, a bit aggressively.
"Yeah, have you seen Riker?" Crusher asks. "He was pretty much dead. How exactly would he have struggled to shoot someone?
Mirasta guesses the truth: Krola was trying to make himself a martyr.

Durken goes and takes Krola by the hand, recognizing exactly what this means. Like, he's still friends with Krola, but that was a dumbass move on the minister's part. And there will probably be more Krola's on the planet's surface if they introduce the Federation right now.
Krola wakes up and asks where he is cuz, you know, he thinks he should be dead.
Durken smiles. "You're on the starship, my foolish old friend."
Krola panics. "No! You can't be friends with the aliens!"
"Yeah, I know."

Later, Durken and Mirasta argue heatedly in the ready room. Durken is going to send the Federation away and essentially shut down the warp program because his people aren't ready to move forward at the same rate that Mirasta is. They need to funnel that money into becoming better members of the galaxy, and stop thinking of themselves as Masters of the Universe... even though they have not idea that they are Not Alone.

Picard is disappointed, but he gets it. "How will you keep us a secret, though? Lots of people saw Riker and guessed that he was not one of you."
"Yeah," agrees Durken. "But let's face it: they won't be believed, and people will make fun of them for saying something, and most people will just go back to watching television and getting on with their lives. It'll just be some goofy story after a while."
Mirasta snorts derisively. "That's probably true." She pauses. "Will you take me with you?" she asks Picard.
He's taken aback. "We probably won't be back here in your lifetime. And I, uh... don't think you'll be able to handle going into space."
"Pssht, I've been ready for that since I was a kid."
Surprisingly, Durken agrees. "I pretty much have to shut down her program. She won't be happy here."
Picard calls Worf to the ready room. "Take Chancellor Durken to the transporter and make up quarters for Minister Yale, who is coming with us."
Mirasta is so freaking stoked.

"Hopefully, you'll be ready for us in our lifetimes," Picard tells Durken.
"And then we can be BFFs," agrees Durken.

Happy, uplifting music as the E flies away from Malcor III!

I love this episode, for two very specific reasons.
Reason one: this episode is lighthearted and amusing. Star Trek can get a bit heavy-handed at times, and watching an episode where it makes fun of itself or handles the episode in a goofy way is refreshing. Some of the best Star Trek material has come from these kinds of stories (such as the fourth film, The One With the Whales). However, let us not forget that, when done incorrectly, the lighter material can fall far short (ugh, the episode where Data learns how to tell a joke).
Reason two: we get to see part of the First Contact process. I love that sort of thing, where the policies and procedures are explained in such a way that you get to see them in action. And up until now, we didn't actually get a good look or discussion of this process. You assume it's like Kirk in the "The Apple," where the E crew stumbles blindly onto a civilization and announces, "All your closely-held beliefs are mumbo-jumbo, and I will now teach you about sex!" Instead, it's handled in a careful, thoughtful way, and much like Durken, I appreciate that the Federation owns up to its mistakes every now and again (ie, incorrect handling of the situation lead to decades of war with the Klingons). I also liked that Picard talked about how controversial the decision to do surveillance was in the Federation. No way that that would have received universal support, and Patrick Stewart even delivered the line in such a way that it gives the viewer the impression that he doesn't agree with it one-hundred percent, either.

However, this episode had a couple of weird notes for me: while I can't presume that Malcorian technology progresses in the same way as that of humans, it seems odd that we never hear about their earlier space flights, or why there seem to be no satellites in orbit around the planet. They have "daily broadcasts" and a centralized government, where those broadcasts put out via some kind of ground signal? Did they skip some steps to get to warp, and will they be flying completely blind when they launch their first warp ship? And the ultimate point of my questions: how did no one notice the E was in orbit? Did they not monitor what was in orbit directly around their planet? Could no one see it from the surface?
My other beef: wouldn't removing Mirasta from Malcor violate the Prime Directive? The PD is partially about not influencing the progress of another culturing, yet I wonder how well their warp program might have fared at a later date when they returned to it without the Minister of Science, and the person who seemed directly responsible for its initial test-runs. A fair equivalent seems like members of the Manhattan Project leaving the planet mid-way through their research. I mean, the atom bomb was not a great invention in my opinion, but not only did we use the technology for other, better applications, but dropping those bombs and seeing the consequences made us take a step back and go, "wow, that was shitty. Let's maybe not use those so casually, okay?" Subtract one or more of that group of scientists, and now the program doesn't run on time, or gets derailed altogether. Mirasta Yale seems to be their top scientists on this warp project, and while I don't doubt that a whole host of scientists were working with her, just as hard, it seems to me that Picard is leaving that particular ship rudderless.



- Fun Facts:

- This is one of five TNG episodes with no stardate.
- The wine that Picard offers Durken is from the bottle that Robert gave him before he left France. Robert requested that Picard not drink it alone.
- Entertainment Weekly ranked this episode as 8 out of a list of top ten TNG episodes to watch in celebration of TNG's 20th anniversary.
- Carolyn Seymour has appeared in TNG before, as Sub-Commander Taris in season two's "Contagion."

- Writer Marc Scott Zicree pitched this story in season three, and would later write an episode of DS9.
- Michael Piller liked the concept of exploring the first contact, but the script went through several rewrites before the final was settled upon. Among the ideas:
  - the story told from the POV of the E crew;
  - making this episode a seasonal cliffhanger;
  - making this Wes' last episode, where he stays behind on the planet as part of the cultural contact team;
  - the planet discovers the Enterprise when one of their shuttles is crippled;
  - the members of the away team become celebrities.
- According to Star Trek rules, the episodes should always be told from the viewpoint of the Federation. This rule was set aside for this episode, and then Piller promised Rick Berman that it would never happen again. However, this rule was revisited in Voyager. Lol.
- The plot was seen as a homage to the film "The Day the Earth Stood Still."
- The sets and props were made to look like contemporary Earth, with slight differences, to make it look "alien."
- The Lanel scene was written at the last minute, and with Bebe Neuwirth in mind for the role.
- This episode is the first time that a cast member from the show Frasier (also distributed by Paramount) appeared on Star Trek. Kelsey Grammer appeared in a fifth season episode of TNG, and most of the main cast of Frasier appeared in a skit about Voyager with Kate Mulgrew for the 30th anniversary special of Star Trek.
- Jonathan Frakes liked the idea for this episode, as well as the guest stars, but thought the episode contained loopholes.
- Marina Sirtis thought this episode was interesting, and she and Patrick Stewart agreed that Picard and Troi were the best people to make official first contact with the Malcorians.



Red deaths: 0
To date: 0
Gold deaths: 0
To date: 0

Blue deaths: 0
To date: 0
Unnamed color crew deaths: 0
To date: 11,000

Obnoxious Wes moments: 0
To date: 1

Legitimate Wes moments when he should have told someone to go fuck themselves: 0
To date: 0

Sassy Geordi moments: 0
To date: 2

Sassy Wes Moments: 0
To date: 1

Sassy Worf Moment: 0
To date: 2

Sassy Riker Moments: 1
To date: 8

Sassy Picard Moments: 0
To date: 7

Sassy NPC Moments: 0
To date: 1
Sassy Data Moments: 0
To date: 2
Sassy O'Brien Moments: 0
To date: 0
Sassy Crusher Moments: 0
To date: 2
Sassy Troi Moments: 0
To date: 4
Sassy Guinan Moments: 0
To date: 1
Sassy Guest Star Moments: 0
To date: 3

Number of times that it is mentioned that Data is an android: 1
To date: 21

Number of times that Troi reacts to someone else's feelings: 0
To date: 14

Number of times that Geordi "looks at something" with his VISOR: 0
To date: 1
Number of times when Data gives too much info and has to be told to shut up: 0
To date: 1
Picard Maneuvers: 0
To date: 16
Tea, Earl Grey: 0
To date: 5

ST:TNG Season Four, Episode Fourteen "Clues"

ST:TNG Season Four, Episode Fourteen "Clues"
Production Order: 14
Air Order: 14
Stardate: 44502.7
Original Air Date: February 11, 1991

Anybody else spend their entire December weekends volunteering at a petting zoo, asking small children over and over, "Would you like to pet the kitten? Isn't she so soft?"

No?

Just me?

Okay, then.

*******

We open seeing shots of Worf's mok'bara class, which is new for this show. (If you're not familiar with mok'bara, it's Klingon martial arts and is similar to tai chi.)

Picard's Log 44502.7: "We finished up this one mission early, which is awesome, because we've been so freaking busy lately that no one has had time for hobbies and stuff. So the crew is fucking around for a few days. Gonna cruise by this one nebula, and I'm mentioning it and the fact that I think it'll be a walk in the park as a way to foreshadow that some shit is about to go down, because frankly, an episode where we just have downtime is not that interesting. Nobody wants to watch me hanging out watching Netflix."

As more foreshadowing, we see Crusher put some clear, empty pantyhose containers on a machine and smile. We have no idea what she's doing, but she seems to be enjoying herself.

Last of the Picard voice-overs: "Also doing a thing I like, and introducing a friend to it."

Surprise.

Guinan swings into the Dixon Hill office and asks for him, but she's stymied by Hill's obstinate girl Friday, Madeline. Madeline says Hill doesn't want to be disturbed, and Guinan is annoyed. She and Picard were supposed to do this thing, and Madeline is holodeck-blocking her.
Madeline tries to get smart and say that Hill is incommunicado, but she can't remember the last part of the word, stutters, and makes a sound like a cat horking up a hairball. Guinan finishes the word for her.

"Tell him Gloria from Cleveland is here. I have an appointment at 2:00."
"It's 2:10," argues Madeline.
"I had trouble with the clothes," snaps Guinan, lifting her skirt to reveal a set of stockings and a garter.
Nice gams, Whoopi.

Madeline calls into the back office to tell Hill that Gloria from Cleveland is here to see him, but she hangs up and tells Guinan that Hill has never heard of her.
Guinan drops the pretense and starts to tell Madeline that she and Picard set this up in advance, and they're meeting here at 2:00, but she realizes that gatekeeper Maddie has no idea what she's talking about.
"Fuck it," says Guinan. She goes around the desk, Madeline protesting at her, and opens the office door.
Oops.

The dude with the gun gestures for her to come inside and close the door.
... did Madeline know this shit was happening five feet from her? Cuz she was real casual about it.
This new guy (Johnny) is clearly holding Hill hostage, and Hill apologizes to "Gloria" for getting her mixed up in this.
Picard and Guinan insist that Gloria is Hill's cousin, and they speak in weird, fake film noir gangster accents. Johnny wants to know where his money is. Guinan awkwardly tries to play along.
But Johnny steps in front of the window and is immediately filled with bullet holes from a machine gun. Bye, Johnny.
Somehow, Madeline hears none of this, and doesn't come running. Has the office been sound-proofed? Does Dixon Hill make that kind of cash?
"WTF even is this?" Guinan demands
"A mystery!" says Picard enthusiastically. "We don't know who this guy is, or who killed him, or where his money went, or why he thinks Hill took it! Now we look for clues."
Guinan is unconvinced. "This is fun?"

The phone on the desk rings, and Picard picks it up. It's Data.
"Hey, sir. Thought it would be less distracting to call you this way instead of through comm badges, which might ruin the effect of the holodeck."
That's pretty damn considerate, Data.
"Anyway, we came across a weird-ass planet in the T-Tauri system, and wouldn't you know, it's class-M."
"Oh. Regulations say we check it out. Call up the bridge crew. Thanks, Data."
Is... is there not a crew on the bridge already? Can you not check shit out with the crew that's already in place?
Picard turns to Guinan and says he has to go, but she's welcome to stay and work on the mystery without him.
"Aww, Picard," she replies. "I love you and your quirky shit, but I'm really over this crap. Thanks, though."
I don't blame her. She probably wants to get out of those damn garters and into something less uncomfortable.

Picard enters the bridge.
"So there's a class-M planet, and an unstable wormhole," says Riker.
"There are almost 40 wormholes in this system," adds Data. "Oh, hey."
Data looks up to see the wormhole swallow the ship.

Oops.

Dramatic music! Opening credits break!

When we return, Data is helping up Picard while the others climb to their feet. Data explains that the wormhole knocked everybody the hell out for about 30 seconds, but he scanned the whole ship and didn't find any problems.
Riker checks the computer. "We're really far away. Like, a whole day's travel."
"I think I should change the ship's clock to reflect the actual time," volunteers Data.
Crusher calls. "WTH?"
"Unstable wormhole," explains Picard. "We were all knocked out for 30 seconds. Everything okay there?"
"Yep, just little injury reports coming in. You guys cool?"
He confirms they are and hangs up.
Sassy Riker Moment: "We're lucky we weren't knocked into next week."
Hmmm, kind of actually possible in Star Trek.
But Data swings around in his chair. "Actually not possible here. The wormhole was small and not very powerful. Probably just a local thing."
"Yeah, but we were gonna check out that planet...." says Picard.
"Not a good idea," Data puts in. "That wormhole was super unstable. It would be way safer to send a probe to check it out."
"Cool," agrees Picard.

Down in sick bay, Crusher is scanning O'Brien's arm and asking him what he was doing when he fell. This week's Exposition to Prove That O'Brien is a 3-D Character has him telling Crusher that he was hanging a plant for his wife, and that she's trying to make him more of a plant guy. It is not going well.
Crusher turns to ask her nurse for something, but seeing that the nurse is busy with a patient, cheerfully tells her "never mind," and goes to get it herself.
The nurse, who we've seen before and who has had lines, finally gets a first name: Alyssa. She won't get a last name until later (Ogawa) and she isn't going to get the full O'Brien Treatment with plenty of lines and stories of her own, but at least she isn't just "nurse" anymore. She's better than a piece of equipment, and clearly friends with Crusher, as she's being called by her first name rather than Nurse Ogawa.

Anyway, Crusher goes into a back room to grab something and stops at her pantyhose eggs, which are now filled with... pink cotton candy or something. She pauses. Clearly, that cotton candy should not be there.
She goes back to O'Brien and casually asks Alyssa if she saw anybody messing with her pantyhose eggs or if she changed it at all.
"Hell no," replies Alyssa. "I wouldn't touch one of your experiments."

Back on the bridge, the probe info has come back, and the brown planet that they saw on the viewscreen earlier is now green.
"It's got a helium-nitrogen atmosphere," says Data.
"But we saw - and you reported - a class-M planet," says Picard. "The whole reason why we went over there was because you said it was class-M."
Data shrugs. "Could be interference from the wormhole."
"That's a weirdly specific thing for the sensors to get wrong," points out Riker.
"Maybe a planet we detected on the other side of the wormhole," suggests Data. "We can check all of the nearby systems here for a planet like the one we saw. It would take about six days."
Picard snorts. "Who has that kind of time? Naw, we're good. Check the sensors to make sure they weren't damaged by the wormhole, Data. Let's get out of here."

Suspicious music! Zoom-in on Data!

Crusher goes to see Picard in the ready room, and she takes her incubator of cotton candy.
"Cool, Diomedian scarlet moss," says Picard. "That's a good crop. Shit's hard to cultivate. Didn't know you were into ethnobotany."
She admits she dabbles in it, and says this batch concerns her: she just started it, and there's already a full day's growth. "We were seriously only out for 30 seconds?"
"Yeah," he says. "All of the ship's chronometers, the systems, even Data, says we were out 30 seconds. Maybe your moss was fast-growing, or something weird happened to it."
"I have a bunch of this," she argues. "Maybe something weird happened to one, but not all of it. I think we were out for a whole day."

Dramatic music! Commercial break!

Picard's Log, supplemental: "Data says we were out 30 seconds. Crusher's moss says it was more."

Picard holds a senior staff meeting in the Obs Lounge with the moss.
"I have a theory about the moss," announces Data. "(Science concerning some theorist from the 22nd century.)"
"Doesn't quite match up," argues La Forge. "That theory is about energy, not matter."
"Could still apply," says Data.
"Okay, cool," says Picard. "Hey Data, could you go help Nelson with the sensor thing? I told him to expect you."
Data agrees and leaves, and it's real obvious that A) peeps don't trust him, and B) Picard just got rid of him on purpose.
"Anybody think Data's telling the truth?" Picard asks, once Data is gone.
They hesitate, then Geordi says he doesn't buy it, that's he's surprised Data suggested that weak-ass theory about the moss.
They bat about some questions to ponder, like if they were out a whole day, then why did nobody's beard grow? And what happened on that day that they aren't aware of?
"Eh, Data doesn't lie, though," reasons Picard. "Maybe whatever affected us, affected him in another way, and he's actually being honest."
"We could check the ship's chronometer to see if someone messed with it," says Geordi.
"And I could check the transporter trace analysis, see if there's something there as well," adds Crusher.
"Both," replies Picard. "But nobody make Data suspicious, okay?"

La Forge goes down to Engineering and gets an update on the sensors from Data (they're fine), then tells Data that Picard wants him on the bridge. Once Data leaves, La Forge asks him in a meaningful way to help him with the computers. Poor Nelson. He has nothing to do with this shit, but everyone keeps involving him in their intrigue.

There's a small time-filler scene where Crusher asks O'Brien who went through the transporter last, and he looks it up and tells it's one of his transporter crew. She asks him to send that crew member to sick bay.
In sick bay, Crusher and Alyssa scan the crew member and discover some discrepancies. Crusher is ecstatic. She calls Picard and he asks her to do a Walk & Talk with him to Engineering.
"I can measure internal clocks at the molecular level," she tells Picard a few minutes later. "I took scans of the last person to use the transporter, and compared them to her trace from the transport. They were off. We were out longer than 30 seconds."

They go down to Engineering.
"Figured out that yes, the ship's chronometer was fucked with," says La Forge. "Here's the shitty part: only Data and I can do it."
Dramatic shot of Geordi!

Picard confronts Data in the ready room about the tampered-with chronometer.

"That's mysterious," says Data.

"Could someone or something have messed with you without you knowing about it?" asks Picard.

"Good question."

"Would you consent to Geordi examining you?"

"Yeah, okay."

There's a security Gold in the ready room with them, and Picard asks her to escort Data to Engineering.

Sassy Data Moment: "I know the way, sir."

They disappear through the door.

Dramatic zoom-in on Picard!

Picard's Log, supplemental: "Looks like we lost a whole day. To what, nobody knows. But Data is looking hella suspicious now."

A section of Data's hair is missing, revealing flashing lights, and La Forge tells him that he's going to start with higher motor functions and go down. He uses some bedside manner, cuz Data is his best friend, and he's a nice guy.

"It's nice of you to make me feel comfortable," says Data, "but I notice that you are uncomfortable."

"Seems like you're not being honest with us," says La Forge. "Anything you want to tell me?"

Data pauses as though about to say something, then decides against it and says he's told them everything he knows.

On the bridge, La Forge reports that Data is functioning perfectly.
"Kinda wanted to find something wrong," he admits.
"Fuck a DUCK," says Riker. "So Data is hiding something, and there's something wrong with our sensors. Because that probe said that that planet was not habitable, but our sensors said it was."
"Data launched that probe," replies Picard, with a look that says he'd rather not remind them of that.
"Could you prove it if he messed with the probe?" Riker asks La Forge.
"Maybe," replies La Forge. He leaves to go check it out.

"Fuck a duck, indeed," says Picard. He tells the bridge at large to see if they can remember what they were doing right before they got knocked out, to search for clues.
Troi doubles over. "Crap, I'm dizzy."
"You should go to sick bay," suggests Picard.
"Nah, I'll lay down in my quarters," she decides.
Worf escorts her there at Picard's request.
She goes in, the door closes, and Worf starts to walk away. Then she screams and he runs back, calling for an override on her door when he yells her name and she doesn't respond.
Terrified, she tells him she looked in the mirror and it wasn't her.

Picard goes to Troi's quarters, where Crusher is scanning her. They both report that Troi is fine now.
"I looked in the mirror, and I saw my own image, but it was like behind my eyes was a stranger? Like my face was a mask?"
Geordi calls Picard. "Found something."

Worf goes to sick bay.
When Crusher asks what's wrong, he huffs and tries to be all, "It's a little complaint, but Picard said to report anything suspicious. Like, it's nothing."
He's holding his wrist, so she scans it. "WTF?"

Picard and La Forge go to Data's quarters. When La Forge shows Data a pic of the green planet, Data says it's the one they scanned before they went through the wormhole, and the one the probe picked up.
"Naw, it's Tethys III with some bits altered," says Geordi.
"You go through the ship's library and plug this image of some obscure planet into the probe?" Picard asks Data.
Data pauses. "Can't say either way," he says finally.
Picard sends La Forge to launch another probe, and Geordi apologizes to Data on his way out.
"Troi had a creepy hallucination. You know why?" asks Picard.
"Can't say."
"Ugh, I'm trying to get to the bottom of this shit, Data! Why are you being such a dick?"
"It's not by choice," Data admits.

"Would you endanger your friend and colleague Deanna?"
Another pause. "Do the needs of the many outweigh the needs of the few or one?"
"Are... you protecting us?"
"Can't say."
This "Data being enigmatic" thing is starting to piss me off.
It's pissing off Picard, too.
"Answer me directly: what really happened to us?"
"I can't answer that."
"WTF, Data? I mean, what if you were in my position?"
This one gives Data pause, and he rips the Bandaid off. "So... it seems like I tampered with the ship's records, screwed with an investigation, and disobeyed a direct order from a commanding officer. I think we both know what that means."
Yeah, Picard does. "A court-martial. Your career would be over."
"That's true."
"And that asshole Maddox would probably take you apart to find out what went wrong."
"Yeah."

Dramatic music! Commercial break!

Back in the ready room, Crusher and Worf tell Picard that Worf's wrist was broken, reset, and mended by sick bay equipment during the time when they were all unconscious. Worf looks like he'd like to just sink into the ready room carpet and disappear forever. Crusher and Picard are mostly talking about him, near him, like parents talking to a principal about a kid who got in trouble, while the kid sits nearby in embarrassed silence.
"You think Worf was awake during that time?" Picard asks Crusher.
She thinks they all were, and then their memories of that time were erased or blocked or changed somehow. Picard asks who would have done such a thing.
Worf finally speaks up. "The list of people on this ship who are quick and strong enough to break my wrist is really short. Data's on it."
"Yeah, I don't think so," says Picard. "I mean, I know he's being fishy, but there are other parts of this puzzle, and I have a hunch that Data isn't a completely willing participant."
Geordi calls again. "Our probe is near that planet."

They all hurry onto the bridge, and Geordi put his findings up on the viewscreen. It's the same planet they saw when they first rolled up.
"Class-M, no spacial distortions anywhere nearby," says Geordi. "Like, even if the wormhole was closed, we could still detect residuals."
"There is no wormhole," says Picard. "It's a fucking ruse. There are a bunch of clues here that suggest that we are missing a day, a day that we experienced. And Worf's broken wrist says that there was a struggle for our lives."
"We're still alive," says Crusher. "We probably won."
"Data acting weird says that we didn't," he argues. "And he seems to accept that fact that his career could be ruined, just to keep his secrets. I think maybe it was a stalemate. With part of a compromise being that we had to have our memories erased. And somehow Data got roped into keeping his mouth shut."
"Shit, that means that us uncovering this stuff upsets the stalemate," points out Riker. "Should we just... leave it alone? Go about our merry way?"
"No," says Picard. "We have to figure out how Data fits into this, or Starfleet will decide he's untrustworthy, and we end up with the same problem. No, we gotta talk to Data. Let's go back to the T-Tauri system and see what's up."

So they go back to the planet, and an energy field appears between them and the planet.
Is it a giant green hand in space?
Naw, it looks like a diaphanous length of gauze, floating on the surface of bathtub water or something.

The field puts out an energy pulse, and Picard is curious, so he just lets it hit the shields.
"It dispersed," Worf announces.
But it actually didn't. In true TNG tradition, a ball of light assaults Troi while she's sleeping.

Troi shows up in Data's quarters. Fortunately, whatever is possessing her allowed her to put on clothes so she isn't just wandering around naked. 
"You're in our space again," says Troi in a weird, deep-ass voice.
"Ah, you again," says Data. "Yeah, sorry. I'm trying."
"I have to destroy the ship," says Troi-thing.
"I can maybe fix this still," he offers.
La Forge pokes his head through the door. "Hey Data, you're wanted on the bridge."

Data and La Forge exit the turbolift and Data goes straight to Picard's side.
"We're back at that planet you lied about," says Picard.
"Yeeeaaahhh... we need to leave?" says Data. "Like, yesterday?"
"No way," says Picard. "Spill the fucking tea already."
"I can't. And, it's dangerous to be here, so let's go."
"What's the deal with this planet?" demands Picard.
"Can't say. Was ordered not to."
"Why the hell not?" Picard puts on his conspiracy face. "Did Starfleet contact you, and tell you not to say anything to us?"
"Can't say."
"Who ordered you to not say anything to us?!"
But then Troi-thing enters, and her tea is extra strong.
"You did, sir," replies Data.

WHAAAAA? Dramatic music! Commercial break!

"The fuck?" asks Picard. "Me?"
"Hey, that energy field is getting closer," warns Worf.
Riker starts to tell the crew to do max shields, but Data interrupts to say that max shields will speed up the takeover of the ship, and to vary the shield strength and shape as quickly as possible. And even though Data is being super sketch, Picard still trusts him, and goes with his recommendation.
The energy field tries to match the shifting shields.
Data pretty much gives up the ghost at this point. "So that shield thing will delay the takeover, but it will still happen. The Paxans have better technology than us."
Troi-thing steps forward. "You invaded our system," it says in that weird voice-modulation.
Worf draws his phaser, but Data points out that shooting the Troi-thing will only end in harming Troi.
Geez Worf, don't you know how alien possession by energy ball works?

Time for an exposition dump!
"The Paxans are xenophobes," explains Data. "They don't want contact, and they don't want people to know about them. So they set up a trap around their planet. The energy field stuns everyone on board the invading ship and puts them in stasis."
"That's why our beards didn't grow," La Forge tells Worf.
"Then they move the ship way away from the planet," Data concludes.
"Ah," says Riker. "Then the crew assumes wormhole based on the distance traveled, and goes on their way."
"What went wrong?" asks Picard.
"Me," says Data. "My tech is unknown to them. So I stayed awake."
Flash-back time!
Past-Data is shown activating emergency procedures and creating the shifting shield. Then he tells Majel to basically fill the ship's air with smelling salts.
The crew wakes up.

Data voice-over: "The Paxans can do a bunch of cool energy-manipulation, so they took over Counselor Troi's body to communicate with us."

When Past-Troi-thing stands to talk to Picard and the others, Worf rushes it with a phaser. It breaks his wrist.
Picard puts a stop to the action to talk to Troi-thing.
"You're not allowed to know about us," the Troi-thing tells him. "We tried to put you in stasis and it didn't work. Gonna have to blow you to smithereens now."
"No good," says Picard. "We're part of this vast network of explorers. If you blow us up, someone will come looking for us. More people than you can imagine will know about you. I promise to keep your secret and never tell anyone about you if you just let us go."
"Not gonna happen," argues Troi-thing. "There are 1000-plus people on this ship. Someone will talk."
And now we get to the stalemate:
"Can your stasis stuff affect memory? Like, could you erase the memories of everyone on board? Then no one will know about you, and you can move us and make it look like a wormhole thing."
"Yeah, but it'll take like, one of your days to hit up everyone on board. Also, dude is immune?" Troi-thing points out, looking at Data. "He'd still know."
Picard pauses. "Okay Data: gonna give you a direct order. Don't tell anyone about the Paxans. Not Starfleet, not me." 
"Cool," replies Data.
Picard announces to the bridge crew that they better start erasing all of this crap ASAP from the records.

"So we did," says Present-Data. "I changed the ship's chronometer to show that only 30 seconds had passed, and we erased all of the records and everybody's memories, but you guys started picking threads in the sweater, and the whole thing unraveled."
"And here we are again," says Riker.
"Yeah, gotta blow you up this time," says Paxan-Troi.
"No, wait!" says Picard. "The problem with this time is that little clues were left. It makes for a mystery. Humans love mysteries. We gotta get to the bottom of shit. What say we treat this last time as a dress rehearsal, and we try again, making sure we leave no clues. Things like Crusher's experiment, and Data tinkering with the computer, and his weird behavior. Anyway, can we try again?"
"Eh, I kind of like you," shrugs Paxan-Troi. "Give it another shot."
"Cool," says Picard. "Nobody fuck it up this time!"
The Paxan energy-thing leaves Troi.

Later, the bridge crew wakes up on the floor.
"That was some wormhole," says Data. "You guys were all knocked unconscious for about 30 seconds."
Picard does a quick check: no damage or casualties. Everyone is fine, but they're a ways from where they started.
"Oh yeah," says Picard. "We were gonna check out that class-M planet back there."
"I think it's too dangerous," says Data. "That wormhole was hella unstable. Plus, there might not even be a planet there. Might be a reflection or something from the wormhole."
"Probe?" suggests Riker.
"Sure," shrugs Data.
"Eh, good enough for government," brushes off Picard. "Let's get back on track. Also, call Starfleet and let them know there's a big-ass wormhole there that needs to be avoided."
Knowing close-up on Data...

This is an episode that I like quite a bit. There's good Star Trek stuff here, some fun at the beginning, and the mystery is top-notch: what happens when the guy who is suspected of fishy behavior is actually incapable of lying? (Okay, okay - all of his answers end up being "Can't say," which gets annoying, but still.)
Thing is, when you go over an episode with a fine-toothed comb, you notice stuff that was never explained, or things that warrant more detail, or... well, just plot-holes in general.
The Paxans are a xenophobic culture that secretly diverts possible visitors by making them think that they've gone through a wormhole. As defenses go, that's pretty freaking clever. No need to waste resources on military, or time making threatening gestures, or money building a fucking wall. They just use tech to knock everybody the hell out and tow them to a safe distance. A+.
So that's how we get our mystery and backstory, and both are great. But the problem turns out to be Data, in that he was awake the whole time, and his promise to past-Picard to keep the secret might have worked, had they not inadvertently left clues behind.
And here's where I make McKayla Maroney face and go, "Eh..."

It's the "humans are wonderful and special" thing again. Picard frantically explains to Troi-Paxan that humans are curious, and love mysteries, and getting down to the bottom of them is considered exhilarating. Troi-Paxan is quick to give them another chance to do it right. "You're an interesting species," is how she puts it. "Worthy of a second chance."
I know we can chalk this up to needing to wrap up the episode in the time allotted, but if you were a xenophobe, and carefully diverted a ship from your space with the promise that they would not be back, then showed up on your doorstep right away again, would you take their word for it a second time, or blow them up? My guess is gooey-kablooey, but here she decides to let them go ahead with it. Is Picard really that skilled a diplomat, or are humans just charmed with great luck? Are Worf or Troi or the Bolian barbers ever annoyed that things just magically turn out okay for humans at every turn? I've often found myself muttering that humans are the Gryffindors of the universe, and here they fit the bill again: they win the day "just because." The Dumbledore of this particular universe is the writing staff, awarding extra points to Team Human for farting.

Well done, humans!

So let's set that aside and talk about the problem with Picard's plan. The initial idea wasn't a bad one, as long as Data agreed to not tell future-Picard the truth, or to let anyone know for as long as he continued to function. The trouble lies in that missing time: they wouldn't be missing an hour, but 24 of them. That's a lot of hours to miss. I know that's what set off the "mystery," but think about that for a minute: there's the problem of life going on without them. The moss grows. Pets on board would be hungry and will have probably eliminated all over the floor in their quarters. Worf's wrist will still have been broken and reset. And most telling: Starfleet will have continued to function in that 24 hours. What if they had sent a communique to Picard that went unanswered? When they hit dock again, someone would have noticed that Data had screwed with the chronometers, and asked Picard about it. Oops. And we begin again.
Speaking of beginning again, we end with the Enterprise attempting to cover their tracks a second time in preparation for being knocked out, towed away, and relieved of their memories again. So, if we do the math, that's
- the initial 24 hours that went missing;
- the second 24 hours that now need to be erased as well;
- all of the time between these first two times, when the senior staff were investigating Data - we don't know how long that was, maybe a few hours, but maybe several days.
When they dock again, they'll be missing possibly three or more days. The E crew can try to explain it as wormhole time, but Data claims they were out 30 seconds, not days on end. Would he tell the crew that they had been out for all of those days, instead of half a minute? Starfleet would still ask Data for his report for those days.
"The whole crew was out? Why didn't you contact us? What were you doing those days? Why weren't you bringing the ship back to Federation space in the meantime?"
There are too many variables to cover. I get that they're out in the middle of nowhere, but they're still tied umbilically to Starfleet, who is definitely going to open an investigation as to why 1000+ people are missing a number of days.

A tiny little side thing: Madeline can definitely hear into Hill's office on the holodeck. She heard the glass breaking and guy getting shot, but never ran in to check on Hill or "Gloria" or even react to it. How do I know? Data's phone call initially rang in the front office, and they overheard her answer the phone, which resulted in a quasi-funny moment: "Sorry, there's no Captain Picard here. Try the docks." Picard then called to her to transfer the call into his office. Is the program set so that Madeline doesn't respond to things unless they concern her directly? Why would she not scream, or rattle around outside like she was crawling under her desk, or yell that she was calling the cops? Did the writers temporarily forget she was there?

Despite my objections, this is actually a fairly good episode, with some fun and funny moments. The mystery is solid storytelling, and the intrigue of "is the honest-by-nature guy lying?" is interesting enough to hold the audience's attention.

- Fun Facts:

- This episode came from a spec script from fan Bruce D Arthurs. Michael Piller liked it well enough to offer Arthurs a writer job on the show. The script was then rewritten to take out Wes' part and polish up the dialogue.
- There's a similarity between this episode and the Red Dwarf episode "Thanks For the Memory."
- Director Les Landau used longer, more fluid takes on the flashback scenes to set them apart from the real-time ones.
- This episode is a bottle show.
- First appearance of the mok'bara classes.
- First mention of Nurse Ogawa's first name.
- Picard mentions the Paxans by name during the flashback, despite the fact that Troi-Paxan had not mentioned the name of her people.


Red deaths: 0
To date: 0
Gold deaths: 0
To date: 0

Blue deaths: 0
To date: 0
Unnamed color crew deaths: 0
To date: 11,000

Obnoxious Wes moments: 0
To date: 1

Legitimate Wes moments when he should have told someone to go fuck themselves: 0
To date: 0

Sassy Geordi moments: 0
To date: 2

Sassy Wes Moments: 0
To date: 1

Sassy Worf Moment: 0
To date: 2

Sassy Riker Moments: 1
To date: 7

Sassy Picard Moments: 0
To date: 7

Sassy NPC Moments: 0
To date: 1
Sassy Data Moments: 1
To date: 2
Sassy O'Brien Moments: 0
To date: 0
Sassy Crusher Moments: 0
To date: 2
Sassy Troi Moments: 0
To date: 4
Sassy Guinan Moments: 1
To date: 1
Sassy Guest Star Moments: 0
To date: 3

Number of times that it is mentioned that Data is an android: 2
To date: 20

Number of times that Troi reacts to someone else's feelings: 1
To date: 14

Number of times that Geordi "looks at something" with his VISOR: 0
To date: 0
Number of times when Data gives too much info and has to be told to shut up: 1
To date: 1
Picard Maneuvers: 0
To date: 16
Tea, Earl Grey: 0
To date: 5

Pavel and Princess Ginger